UPDATE THURSDAY 4:30AM - DRAVEN
Hello All from Codyland,
I have spent the last couple weeks reflecting on our time since July 15th.
We first got the phone call from worm at 1 am about the accident, I remember having to calmly deliver the news to Jesse and while it was sinking in, I immediately began booking tickets to leave California at 5 a.m. We had no idea if Cody would be alive when we landed or not and from what we were told it was highly unlikely. We began making phone call after phone call and receiving phone call after phone call. "In the midst of this chaos, keep stillness inside of you" I remember repeating in my head several times so that I would keep level and calm for Jesse, friends and family calling on the phone.
I remember feeling every part of me tensing up as we exited the plane and made "the call" to see if Cody was still with us. Rushing to the hospitals 3rd floor, turning the corner and seeing everyone standing, sitting, pacing, cringing, sweating, with these looks of helplessness and desperation that mimic-ed ours. I remember just trying to get Jesse to Chelsea and them together to Cody. I remember absorbing the environment around me, the florescent lighting, empty used beds in the hallway, the families passing by crying dazed and lost in fear, I had idle conversation with whomever I was next to at any given time as we wore down the wax on the floor pacing back and forth, I'd listen to the double doors to the NCCU open and close over and over with no new words exiting to comfort, resolve or give us false hopes. Not knowing which one of the passing by families we would soon become. We were all just there, individually lost but together.
Then just as we went from minute by minute, we went to hour by hour, then day by day, moving to week by week and then month to month. We continue on going through the months and the motions, trying to make progress, achieve goals, and make the right decisions in this confusing world of recovery.
Cody and I have been charging through this together for over 4 months now and the day has come where we will be parting ways here on the 22nd Sunday of November. I have pushed for this and the trip to Vermont for a while now to happen and believe me it wasn't that easy, he is a stubborn booger sometimes. Though it will be undoubtedly more difficult for me as I have been the watchful eye, I feel it is the best thing for him to move forward in his recovery and to achieve his goals. I had many conversations with Cody about his recovery and getting on snow. He agreed about getting on snow of course but living with barb's turkey ankle wasn't so easy. I think it best for him to go to Vermont and get on snow so I became relentless about it and I set an absolute date and made him book a ticket. He needs to live and feel his passion everyday to move forward. He WILL NOT be racing but he will be on snow with as minimal risk as possible.
I think this is a key element to his future success in every aspect. Independence has been a theme for the past couple weeks with us although it is all with me supervising, he is doing it, He has been driving the car, again with me in it of course, grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, going to the gym everyday etc. He is all grown up now and I will be an empty nester.
Calling and nagging him, checking in too often, sending care packages, checking up on him through friends, inviting myself to visit whenever I want, You know, now that I think about it, I can't wait it will be so much fun to push his buttons. However, I think he will miss me more than he knows. I'm pretty cool and I let him beat me at chess 
The good thing is we will see how it goes and we will go month by month. No decision is set in stone. He can go to Vermont and ski see how he feels and we will go from there. We will be playing it by ear. I will be doing all the things above, plus we will still be posting blogs which will keep all 70,000 of us together and informed as we move forward. He has several options and we will be exploring all of them together. So the next month will be difficult for both of us I think, yet exciting, I am looking forward to him getting on the snow and then calling me the moment and I mean the moment he gets off....
So for now until then,
Draven
I have spent the last couple weeks reflecting on our time since July 15th.
We first got the phone call from worm at 1 am about the accident, I remember having to calmly deliver the news to Jesse and while it was sinking in, I immediately began booking tickets to leave California at 5 a.m. We had no idea if Cody would be alive when we landed or not and from what we were told it was highly unlikely. We began making phone call after phone call and receiving phone call after phone call. "In the midst of this chaos, keep stillness inside of you" I remember repeating in my head several times so that I would keep level and calm for Jesse, friends and family calling on the phone.
I remember feeling every part of me tensing up as we exited the plane and made "the call" to see if Cody was still with us. Rushing to the hospitals 3rd floor, turning the corner and seeing everyone standing, sitting, pacing, cringing, sweating, with these looks of helplessness and desperation that mimic-ed ours. I remember just trying to get Jesse to Chelsea and them together to Cody. I remember absorbing the environment around me, the florescent lighting, empty used beds in the hallway, the families passing by crying dazed and lost in fear, I had idle conversation with whomever I was next to at any given time as we wore down the wax on the floor pacing back and forth, I'd listen to the double doors to the NCCU open and close over and over with no new words exiting to comfort, resolve or give us false hopes. Not knowing which one of the passing by families we would soon become. We were all just there, individually lost but together.
Then just as we went from minute by minute, we went to hour by hour, then day by day, moving to week by week and then month to month. We continue on going through the months and the motions, trying to make progress, achieve goals, and make the right decisions in this confusing world of recovery.
Cody and I have been charging through this together for over 4 months now and the day has come where we will be parting ways here on the 22nd Sunday of November. I have pushed for this and the trip to Vermont for a while now to happen and believe me it wasn't that easy, he is a stubborn booger sometimes. Though it will be undoubtedly more difficult for me as I have been the watchful eye, I feel it is the best thing for him to move forward in his recovery and to achieve his goals. I had many conversations with Cody about his recovery and getting on snow. He agreed about getting on snow of course but living with barb's turkey ankle wasn't so easy. I think it best for him to go to Vermont and get on snow so I became relentless about it and I set an absolute date and made him book a ticket. He needs to live and feel his passion everyday to move forward. He WILL NOT be racing but he will be on snow with as minimal risk as possible.
I think this is a key element to his future success in every aspect. Independence has been a theme for the past couple weeks with us although it is all with me supervising, he is doing it, He has been driving the car, again with me in it of course, grocery shopping, cooking, cleaning, doing laundry, going to the gym everyday etc. He is all grown up now and I will be an empty nester.
Calling and nagging him, checking in too often, sending care packages, checking up on him through friends, inviting myself to visit whenever I want, You know, now that I think about it, I can't wait it will be so much fun to push his buttons. However, I think he will miss me more than he knows. I'm pretty cool and I let him beat me at chess The good thing is we will see how it goes and we will go month by month. No decision is set in stone. He can go to Vermont and ski see how he feels and we will go from there. We will be playing it by ear. I will be doing all the things above, plus we will still be posting blogs which will keep all 70,000 of us together and informed as we move forward. He has several options and we will be exploring all of them together. So the next month will be difficult for both of us I think, yet exciting, I am looking forward to him getting on the snow and then calling me the moment and I mean the moment he gets off....
So for now until then,
Draven
SUCH exciting news to hear...Draven, you were truly a godsend - but it is so exciting to hear that Cody is moving on. Can't wait to hear about your first sojourn on snow, Cody. SO proud of you!
Smiles from afar.
Megan
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Good morning Draven,
Sorry for the phone tag.
Just read your blog and feel for you with the struggle as Cody heads back east. You have been through so much and have played a HUGE role in Cody's recovery and as support for family and friends. One thing for sure, through this blog (Tech)we have all become closer, sharing feelings, struggles, triumphs, big steps and small. What is amazing is that for me i feel that i know you and others even though we have never met. My thought is that Cody will never be to far away from you, Jesse and the gang out west because of this blog and the sharing of this miraculous story with so many more chapters to come. Rest assured that what you have contributed in care, guidance, time, friendship, knowledge, compassion, and love has made all the difference to Cody, his family, friends and so many others. You my friend have impacted peoples lives in a way that can't be measured.
May God Bless you and provide you with strength, support and peace as Cody takes this next journey.
Have a very Happy Thanksgiving and i do hope we get a chance to talk sometime.
Robert (Bob) Wright
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Good Luck Cody and thank you Draven!
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This mornings post brings much joy and a bit of sadness to me. I couldn't be more happy that Cody is going to Vermont to be with his family. I'm so moved and full of emotion thinking about all that Draven has done, only very small brief pieces being published in this blog. Lord knows Draven was sent by him to care for Cody and accomplished that mission with tremendous success. Cody has had more courage than I can imagine and has made such great strides in returning to what he loves. The sadness for me is because I had hoped that one day when his recovery was amazingly far along, that I would get to meet him and shake his hand. Maybe that will happen some day but until then, I want to wish Cody the very best that life has to offer and I want to wish to Draven my admiration and such great respect for all that has been accomplished. God be with you!!! Your Friend Dave
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Draven,Cody, and Family:
Your reflection allows me, once again, to see the miracle in Cody's recovery. It is such a huge gift not only that Cody lived but is recovering - well! Your family is such a beautiful source of strength and affirmation of love. Our family's plight did not have the same outcome. Always remember - you are blessed and life is much more than going down a ski hill! xoxo Vicky Tesmer
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Cody,have fun on the snow, enjoy your life. Embrace your family and friends and Vermont's beauty. Embrace yourself. I wish you the very best there is.
Draven, thank you for all you have done. You helped save Cody's life and you brought many people from all over the world together sharing love, hope and caring for Cody, to you and the Marshall family and in essence all involved. The power of that alone was huge. Doing and feeling the act of caring can create amazing occurrences.
I wish you the very best there is also. Love you!!
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Cody, Good luck in the future with whatever path you choose. I have followed this blog from the beginning and have enjoyed following your progress. You have come a long ways! I am a past ski racer, coach, and now racer parent. I am amazed at the progress you have made and look forward to good things to come for you. After reading the latest blog from Draven you guys should definately write a book about this whole ordeal. Good Luck and as they always say "Have fun skiing".
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I'm so proud of you Cody and Draven. I thank Draven for his guidance and Cody for his hard work in achieving his recovery. It has been miraculous. As Cody heads back East, I'm sure he will achieve his goals and Draven's. Thank you Draven for the months devoted to caring for Cody. I'm certain Barb and Don will be grateful to have Cody home for Thanksgiving. With much love, Grandma Marshall
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Draven,good job summarizing the agony and the ecstasy of the past 4+ months of Cody's recovery... I still think it will be a made for TV Movie at some point... I can't think of too many stories that are more inspiring ... I think the decision to go back to Vermont is what is best for Cody at this point ... his passion is getting back on the snow and that is where it can happen ...
You have done way beyond what anyone could even imagine doing for Cody and his family ... I'm sure they will be eternally grateful to you ... I am sure you will be rewarded for basically putting your whole life on hold to be Cody's advocate/caretaker... It is time for YOU now ... you deserve it ... you are amazing ... I'm very proud of you ...
Cody, you are a miracle Boy and one Lucky Dude!!! Keep on moving forward!!
Love,
Carol/Mama
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It will be a good thing to return home and ski Vermont. It is where you started. We will look for you, ski with you, urge you on. You will go west and all over the world again.. It will just take time. So go back to your roots. Vermont is awesome.
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draven, 1000 thank yous would not be enough to express the work and time you have given not only to cody and his care but to all of us who have followed the blog and care so much about cody. he will be in good hands when he get home and i will keep an eye on him on the hill as will all of us east coasters. please come for a visit and bring jeese too thank you thank you thank you........................
ed
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Cody and Draven,
What an amazing journey you have been on, and thankfully the outcome is better than we could have imagined at the beginning. Kudos to you, Draven, for your selfless care of Cody all these months, and for doing such a great job getting him to where he is now. And also for knowing that the time has come for him to move on and get back to skiing in Vermont. And Cody, you are an inspiration to so many, and don't ever forget how lucky you are. I know there are tough times ahead, but you've done an amazing job of healing yourself and returning to the athlete you were and will be again. Keep up the great work and I'll happily look forward to your updates on the blog. Love to you both,
Lisa (Lindsey's aunt)
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Cody Man, Draven
Well, reading the blog that Draven just had written it sure seems like I have known both of you a long time without ever meeting you. And I do hope to meet you Cody and Draven one day.
And as a lot of our team of bloggers have said Draven, what an outstanding job you have done being Cody's patient advocate, as well as a tremendous friend. God Bless you for sure. Cody, it sure does seem like it was just July a few months ago. You have met one challange after another, and stayed strong in your spirit for getting better and stronger so that you may pursue your dreams again. So please, stay true to your beliefs. And follow your passion. And as many of us have said before, it is going to be so cool to hear you click into your bindings for the first time and ski down that slippery slope again. "Rock On".
Draven, please keep everyone in touch thru the website for sure, keep your self healthy, and thank you for being there for the Cody Man, you are a true friend. I will follow the website all the way untill a decision is made if, and when to not post blogs any more.
"Never Give Up, Never Give In"
Cody, Draven:
Your Friend,
Coach "Woody" Brackney
Mt. Holly Snowsports School/Mi.
Fenton HS Ski Team
Thunderbolt Training Centers/USSA
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Thanks for being a good friend, Draven. I hope we get some turns in @ Killington some day. (I work with Don @ Ramshead)
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Draven,
I do not know you, but i am beyond impressed by your devotion and passion to help a friend. Your selflessness and commitment is beyond compare. As a parent of an adult ski racer, you seem as an old soul, someone rich in knowledge beyond your years. Take care of yourself. You too will suffer the loss of your role as care giver and friend. Know that you too have an entire support group behind you also, cheering you on. Good Job Draven!
Megan
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Draven,
You have, and will continue to be, such an angel to Cody and all of us that follow his progress here. THANK YOU....and GOD BLESS YOU!
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I can understand your feelings. It was really a sad incident. I have felt all your sorrow from your words. We all have to face situations like these. What we have to do is not let our mind to lose from our control. We have to believe in faith. I too hope that one day Cody will get off will call you for one more chess match and that time you can let him beat you again. We all will pray for him and my only request to you is to never lose your control over your mind. Understand the fact that no one can control God’s wish. I wish Cody all the best.
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